Walk. Like. An Egyptian.

The last week of Feb. Curt and I took a trip to Egypt with 2 coworkers, Lindsay and Chris. We were able to get some SUPER cheap tickets, plan for a 3 day Nile cruise and a couple of days in Cairo for less than a thousand dollars – and it had been nearly 2 months since our last vacation, so it was TIME. :)

We arrived in Luxor, where the cruise would leave from, early on a Friday morning. As in most Muslim countries, it was pretty darn quiet, outside of the guys trying to get you to take THEIR taxi from the airport. While we drove through the country side and then into this sleepy town, I couldn’t help but think we were in Cuba, even though I have never been to Cuba. The cars and cabs were from the 1960s at the latest and all with Slavic names from companies that no longer exist. The buildings were for the most part small, square and industrial, at least those that were finished. We found out that the Egyptian government taxed owners of “finished buildings” which has obviously become an incentive for people to NOT finish their buildings. Many apartment buildings which were CLEARLY lived in for long periods of time, had ribar sticking out from the “roof” which while it had concrete poured, had no appearance of being “finished” by any stretch of the imagination.

We spent the day by the pool, saw the Luxor temple that night and prepared to get on our cruise the next day. This once sleepy town was no more after the noon prayers. There are people out with their donkeys carrying loads of stuff, in carriages tourists can rent, or just feeding donkeys on the side of the road, not to mention the cars and buses and their horns. ALWAYS THE HORNS! You see, side and rear view mirrors are not used here. At all. People just pull out when and where they would like and the driver who is getting ready to plow into them gives a stern HONK to let them know that “Hey, I’m here, don’t pull into this lane.” Or even better, “Hey, I think you are driving to slowly, so why don’t you move to the side so I can sneak through?” I think the second one happened more often than the first.

The Luxor temple was amazing. There are carvings on almost every square inch of wall that are still incredibly clear and easy to make out. The structure itself, as with all of the other temples we ended up seeing is mammoth, especially when you realize it was built about 2000 years before Christ. By hand, with no machinery as you and I know it today. Some of the ceilings in the temples (which by now are pretty much fully open to the elements) have the original paint on them that is still vivid. You’ll be able to see it in the pictures included. The next morning we went through the fiasco of flagging down a cab, who then disregarded geometric rules as he tried to squish our luggage into his trunk (he was one of the few without the roof cargo) and then haggle over price for 10 minutes. Meters are apparently without merit in this country. Anyway, you’d think if you know the name of your cruise line you will be able to see it from the shore, but that is just being WAY too sensical of you. You see, there are easily 50 cruise boats in Luxor at any one time and they usually dock them 3 or 4 deep, not to mention that OUR cruise boat was not in the down town area with all of the others. Guess that’s what we get for being cheap bastards and not paying for the “transfers” that would ordinarily come with the cruise. We learned our lesson on that one.

The cruise itself was cool. We were in Isis Group and Magid was our tour guide. The food was pretty good, the entertainment, like most cruises, was a little lame at night, but since I just found out we were 5 weeks pregnant, I was able to fall asleep at 9PM with no problems. J Our first morning we had to get up at 5 AM to take a bus to the Valley of the Kings and see some tombs, then to Queen Hatshepsut’s Temple and then Agamemnon, as well as the obligatory alabaster store. The tombs were AMAZING. While they had been looted eons ago by thieves, they carvings and the original paintings (again, 2000 years BEFORE Christ) were so vivid and clear, it took your breath away. It was pretty interesting how much the Egyptians valued their afterlife. Our guide shared that kings didn’t build palaces, they prepared their tombs as soon as they were put on the throne. The Great Pyramids were some of the first tombs, but they were such an easy target for thieves (they too were emptied long ago, except King Tut) that they didn’t want their departure for the afterlife to be disturbed.

The morning of day two I lay in bed enjoying the quiet and sound of the river, only to hear Curt suddenly hurling in the bathroom. Yep, he got the Death on the Nile. He proceeded to have ALL types of gastrointestinal issues for the next 24 hours, even though he tried to be a trooper and make it to the first temple that day. Otherwise, he stayed locked in our room as I tried to coax him to eat soup or drink tea or the coffee with lemon the staff insisted he drink. He was having none of it. On the morning of day 3 of the cruise, when we had to leave the boat, we got a phone call that our coworker Lindsay had succumbed to the Death and as we had to leave our rooms by 7:30 AM we made a game time decision for she and I to skip the tour and to change our flights to Cairo for the earliest one we could get. Even if she had to travel while she was violently ill, at least she would be in a hotel room as soon as we could get her there and she could whimper to herself quietly. Curt and Chris took the temple tour, but as they said, once you have seen one temple, you’ve pretty much seen them all.

When Lindsay and I got to Cairo (after what seemed to be an eternity for her I’m sure) we took a crazy ass cab ride over an HOUR to the hotel. No A/C, so the windows were down the whole time. Apparently air pollution dangers haven’t made it to the powers that be in Cairo because I felt like I was sucking off of a tail pipe the whole time. The thing with the horns is more pronounced and more important in Cairo. Where the US would ordinarily have 3 lanes of traffic wide, drivers will squirm their way to eventually being 5 cars wide. It’s a city of 20 million people and about 2 stop lights - both were flashing yellow when we drove by. There are also people with donkeys, guys on bikes selling bread from 10 foot long boards on their heads, kids playing in the middle of the street (think the day before Christmas outside of your busiest mall entrance – like that), people crossing wherever they think they can make it since there are no lights and no cross walks, buses stopping where they see fit – it’s a madhouse. Our hotel seemed to have speakers from the local mosques actually INSIDE the rooms. Apparently, when mosques are very close to one another, they will stagger their call to prayer so they don’t interrupt one another, which leads to calls to prayer that last anywhere from 15-30 minutes. After finally arriving in our room, I then succumbed to the Death of the Nile. Luckily I was in our room and hadn’t eaten much that day so I got a much easier time of it than Curt or Coco. Turns out, a friend of ours who lived in Egypt for 8 years told us that many of the Nile cruises actually wash their dishes using Nile River water. Considering some people still throw their garbage (the whole can) in the river, it’s no wonder many people get sick from those cruises.

We had a lovely Egyptian guide during our two days in Cairo who took us to the Great Pyramids, Memphis, the Citadel, and the markets. We had stuffed pigeon, some yummy salads, and of course the obligatory hummus and “mixed grill”. I can’t say I ever want to return to Cairo. With so much of the country’s economy based on tourism, it amazed all of us that it seems they have done little to make tourism easier on the tourists (easy public transport, clean air, removing beggars from inside the historical sites, etc.) Constantly we had people in the different sites who would grab your arm and take you to one part of a temple to show you something and then demand “baksheesh”, or a tip. Kind of annoying.

1) Curt in Valley of the Kings
2) Guys in rowboats on the Nile selling cheap crap
3) The pyramids are really SMALL!
4) Curt with the Death of the Nile
5) Chris & Coco - walkin' like egyptians








Deepest apologies for not updating this blog sooner, but more updates are on the way! Promise!